Sex is actually very weird and disgusting

Last weekend I had my second date with the Musical Vegan. We had a good first date, but I had concerns about the fact he was moving away from London soon he was a vegan, and I’m a coeliac, so there’s very little we can both eat. I had suggested he come round to mine to…

The promising date with major obstacles

I had a really good first date the other day, but I think there might be two logistical problems that stop anything getting off the ground. We met on OkCupid, and had been messaging each other for a few weeks before our date, because he’d been away visiting his family for Easter. I really liked…

A sex seance

A ‘wank seance’ – when masturbating, accidentally summoning up the image of a dead relative. Then, not being able to dismiss the image of them looking on, disapprovingly, at what you’re doing. A work friend introduced me to that term, and I found it funny. However, last week, I experienced something even worse. Last Saturday…

20th Century Cocks

Do you ever go to the cinema, and after the trailers, you think you’re watching the first few seconds of the film, but actually, you’re just watching another logo video for one of the film production companies? And the film still hasn’t started yet. Some logos are obvious, like the 20th Century Fox thing, or…

How THE HELL was the first date so good?

Last week I had my second date with Joe-Kay Cupid. Our first date was two weeks earlier, and I had a great time, apart from a couple of issues (mentionitis about his ex and possible miserliness). We were supposed to meet earlier that week, on a Monday night, but he cancelled due to a ‘family…

Excessive physical contact

I’ve just come home from a second date with CAPS LOCK GUY. I feel weird about it. He suggested we go to a comedy night in Angel. I met him at the venue, which was a pub. On our first date, I had a much better time than expected. From our messages, he’d seemed a…