I was mentally prepared to find it a nightmare having a newborn. Having worked with lots of patients with post-natal depression, and being one of the last of my friends and family to have babies, I had earnestly stored away every single difficult detail I heard. I imagined my baby would be a composite of…
I thought I’d start by writing about the birth. I was 39 weeks pregnant, two days before my due date. I had been on maternity leave for a week. I’d spent the week batch cooking dinners to freeze, arranging baby clothes in drawers and overanalysing every bodily sensation. (I also went to the Skygarden in…
Almost a year to the day since my first miscarriage, I’ve just had a baby! Also, Andrew and I had a tiny COVID-compliant wedding, at the end of 2020. I’ve decided to start writing regularly again. I’m planning to write and to catch you up on what has happened between now and my last posts,…
It was 3:40am on a Thursday morning. I was 6 weeks pregnant, and I had started bleeding. I went and got some underwear and put a pad in, and tried to decide what to do. I went into the living room and sat down for a moment, and then went back into the bedroom, and…
Two quite major things have happened since my last post: I got pregnant again Andrew and I decided to get married. My last post described how I got pregnant in August, and the day after my positive pregnancy test, I had a miscarriage. When I spoke to the doctor who had confirmed I’d had a…
At Christmas, Andrew and I decided to have a baby. We’d been thinking about it for a while, but I had been slightly more ready than him. Then, I’m not sure why, at Christmas something clicked for him. We were apart on Christmas Day, but I went to see him at his parents’ house, in…
One of the ‘challenges’ that Andrew and I have come across, is sex not lasting as long as we might’ve hoped. It’s a challenge we often ‘come across’ unexpectedly quickly! Andrew seems to feel a lot worse about it than I do. The layout of my gynaecological zones means I’m never going to come from…
I’ve had my contraceptive implant taken out last week, and within a day and a half, I already felt so much better. As I wrote in a previous post, I decided to get it removed because of the effect it was having on my mood. It was a bit of a palaver to arrange. I…
This is an extract from my diary, when I was 17. For a few months, every time I tried to lose my virginity and have sex with my boyfriend, it didn’t work because I had vaginismus – the anxiety made my vagina involuntarily clamp shut. “It was Rob’s and my 6 month anniversary yesterday. We…
Last weekend Andrew and I had our first weekend away together. It was pretty amazing. I think it was the best weekend away with a boy that I’ve ever had. Some things that happened: He got conjunctivitis and we spent ages trying to buy conjunctivitis cream We had sex in a bunker on a cliff…
Dater Analysis 