Background: I was 13, and on the way home from the fair, I met a boy.
The best day of my life!!
Today was the fair. We saw [some 6th formers that my friends and I fancied] outside the Crown. I went with Becky and Louise. I couldn’t believe what happened on the way home though!
Me and Becky and Louise were walking home from Louise’s house and when we got to the Old Infant School there were these 2 boys who looked just a bit older than us and when we walked past them they kept saying hello to us. We ignored them because at first we didn’t even know they were talking to us. But when we started going down the hill, Becky said they kept looking at us.
She said that one of them must really fancy me and I thought that one of them was gorgeous so when we got to the bottom of the hill we decided to go back and talk to them.
When we got back up we thought they’d gone at first, but then we realised they were sitting on the wall.
I stood on the other side of the road and I asked what
they’re their names were. The one I fancied answered but I couldn’t really understand what he said.
The other one (who I didn’t fancy) said “is that all you want to know?” and I said “yeah and your number!” and he said “what, number one?” (he was a bit drunk) and I go “no phone number” but me and Becky started walking away so if they anything, I didn’t hear what it was.
We went down to where Louise was (she didn’t want to come with us, she was too scared) and a few minutes later I went back to the 2 boys.
They asked what my name was and I said it was Stephanie, because I didn’t want to give too much information to a stranger. I asked them how old they were and that’s when the one I didn’t fancy left. He went off in a car with some one else. The gorgeous one told me he was 20! 20! But he asked me how old I was and I said 14.
He goes “only 6 years”. He asked what Becky’s name was and I said “Araminta”.
Then I went back to Becky and Louise and went over the whole conversation with them.
Then the gorgeous guy came over and I asked him what his name was. He said it was Ben. Louise told him my real name and that I was 13 and Ben said “I can’t believe I’m trying to pull a 13 year old.”
We had a great long conversation for ages.
Before I went back to talk to him on my own, he said “nice figure” and I said “nice hair” because he had gorgeous hair.
Anyway, we talked about music and all sorts. He said I was very beautiful! He lit a cigarette and I go “come on. Let’s go.” Louise goes “No. This is fun.” and I go “But he’s smoking.” and Ben put out his cigarette.
After a long time we found out he lives on [Redacted] Road, (where Natalie lives) and Louise said “come on, we’ll walk you home” to him.
When we got to his house, we stayed outside and chatted more. Eventually he said he had to go and Louise told him to go and get his phone number for me. He ran back into the house and while he was gone Louise and Becky said they both fancied him too.
He came back and we chatted for a few minutes but then he said he really had to go, because he needed the toilet!
We looked at each other and then I leaned up to kiss him on the lips. He was starting to actually kiss me but I was already hugging him! It was nice hugging him! Then I actually did kiss him! With tongues! Then we hugged again.
Then he went inside and me and Becky and Louise went on our way. On the way home they said they were both really jealous of me.
The thing was, Ben was really drunk and if he saw me when he was sober, he might not have liked me so much.
Also, I know people say age doesn’t matter, but I know it could never really work with and Ben because he’s twenty! Mum and Dad would go mental!
I was going to phone Ben, but I think what I had with him was really lovely and if I carried seeing him, I would end up getting hurt. He might think I’m really ugly when he’s sober anyway and also he’s going out with Simone Jones [and 18-year-old girl I knew from School and Girl Guides]. He said he didn’t really like her, but he didn’t want to hurt her feelings because her Nan’s dying.
I think I’ll phone him and ask if I can see him again, to tell him that although he’s lovely, I don’t think it could work between us.
He is lovely though. He’s also a great kisser.
OK, so being chatted up by a drunk 20-year-old is not the scenario you’d ideally want for your 13-year-old daughter. I did end up seeing him for a bit, but we only kissed about 6 times and never did anything sexual. It was never even suggested. I was surprised when I went on to date boys my own age and they were really pushy.
In some ways, dating him had a really positive impact on my self esteem. He was the first boy that ever said anything positive about my appearance. Until then, boys at school would go out with my friends but they would say things like “why are you so ugly?” to me. If we played Spin-the-bottle they would just spin it again if it landed on me. I thought I was hideous until I met Ben.
The downside to dating him was that he already had a girlfriend, who was absolutely lovely, and I felt terrible about that. I think I internalised a lot of shame about that, and that had a negative impact on my self esteem.